I wish this title wouldn’t be so off,
like when my daughter wore purple penguin leggings
with a rainbow striped Frotté sweater
and red patent leather shoes with giant sunflowers on them
that day to school
(it’s no wonder my eyes are failing seventeen years later)
I wish the kitchen cabinets would be properly mounted,
and all the tile grout would be parallel and evenly spaced,
and all of the handles on those cabinets would be the same size,
and that last comment had come before the tile grout one
(because it fits way better)
and I would never see anyone mix up ‘there’ or ‘their’ again
or ‘your’ and ‘you’re’, or ‘delusion’ with ‘dillusion’
(that one hurt)
and I would see no more hairs that have fallen from heads
and stuck themselves to people’s clothing
and are just hanging there, like a dangling modifier, as in the sentence:
“sleeping in the orchard, a serpent stung me”,
which causes my insides to shrivel
(the dangling modifier, not the serpent sting)
much like when I hear the words “the serpent’s sting”
for when does a serpent sting and not bite,
unless their’s a type of scorpion snake out their
which can definitely fly
if it has a ticket
and, not least but definitely not last,
I wish no one would use run on sentences
that never seem to end
they just go on forever
and ever
and ever
until the futile act of its reading, is surceased
I wish this poem would end
so I don’t have to notice that I messed up ‘theirs’
and forgot the last period.
I wish I weren’t so OCD